Still, this arrangement worked out well enough for us to have showed up very many generations later. If the first half-dozen first dates are unsuccessful, it does not mean that you are unappealing or that you are too picky.
Unless you are extraordinarily lucky, the first ten or twenty people you meet—or thirty or forty—are not likely to constitute a good fit to you.
But when struggling to do something, such as find a job, it is important to know what your chances are, so that you do not become demoralized after repeated disappointments. They do not mean that such efforts are doomed to failure.
Studies show that of those submitting resumes in response to an advertised job opening, only two percent will receive an invitation to visit the prospective employer!
But most sensible people think it is a bad idea to marry young.
Similarly, they have avoided getting their own feelings hurt when they were the one who was being rejected.
Do not pretend to being more exciting than you are. Of the next batch of people you reach out to, two respond. One of them who has pretended to be well-educated makes a bad grammatical error, and compounds the offence by telling an off-color joke. Since many of these dates are immediately unsatisfactory, there is no reason to make the experience last any longer than necessary.
Try to come across as a serious person who likes to do things and is interested in new things. Since everyone has a tendency to exaggerate, try to seem genuine. You are likely to find four or five people who seem to be appealing. You reach out to them, but only one or two respond; and they seem unenthusiastic. If the two of you are getting along great, you can change those plans.
I do not know of any reliable statistics about this matter, but the figures I give below approximate the way these dating situations are likely to progress: If you are really serious about dating, you join three or four dating sites.
You read the profiles of other clients and put up your own. (Any lies will surface sooner or later.) Be straightforward. Do not come across as someone who loves everything in the world from classical music to sky-diving. You arrange to meet for only an hour or two for coffee or a drink.
Most people who reach these objectives only do so after repeated attempts. They never have to deal with the awful feelings of unrequited love.